Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts

Sunday, September 28, 2008

some rules..

Rules For Men


1. The Female always makes The Rules.

2. The Rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.

3. No Male can possibly know all The Rules.

4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all The Rules, she must immediately change some or all of The Rules.

5. The Female is never wrong.

6. (If the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong.)

7. (If Rule 6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.)

8. The Female can change her mind at any given point in time.

9. The Male must never change his mind without express written consent from the Female.

10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.

11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female Wants him to be angry or upset.

12. The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.

13. The Male is expected to mind read at all times.

14. The Male who doesn't abide by The Rules, can't take the heat, lacks a backbone, and is a wimp.

15. Any attempt to document The Rules could result in bodily harm.

16. At no time can the Male make such comments as "Insignificant" and "Is that all?" when the Female is complaining.

17. If the Female has PMS, all The Rules are null and void!


and that is amazing hahaha!!

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Life Before the Computer


An
application was for employment
A
program was a TV show
A
cursor used profanity
A
keyboard was a piano!

Memory was something that you lost with age
A
CD was a bank account
And if you had a
3 � inch floppy
You hoped nobody found out!

Compress was something you did to garbage
Not something you did to a file
And if you
unzipped anything in public
You'd be in jail for awhile!

Log on was adding wood to a fire
Hard drive was a long trip on the road
A
mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And a
backup happened to your commode!

Cut - you did with a pocket knife
Paste you did with glue
A
web was a spider's home
And a
virus was the flu!

I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper
And the memory in my head
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash
But when it happens they wish they were dead!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

A new word meaning...

ADULT:A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF:Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO:An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON:A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN:An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:Something other people have, similar to my character lines

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Caught Sleeping At Your Desk?

Just a few tips when you are caught sleeping in your desk...

Just say any of the following:

1. In Jesus name, Amen.


2. Dang! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem.


3. I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress.


4. I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance.


5. I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm.


6. Someone must have put decaf in the wrong pot.


7. They told me at the blood bank this might happen.

8. Whew! Guess I left the top off the White-Out. You probably got here just in time!

helpful? I hope ... hehehe

Career Lessons

simple and worth remembering quotes for you....

  • 1. A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick in the butt.
  • 2. After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before.
  • 3. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
  • 4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
  • 5. Eat one live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.
  • 6. Following the rules will not get the job done.
  • 7. Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.
  • 8. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.
  • 9. When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

helpful?.. haha

Saturday, September 6, 2008





Stress in the workplace is not a new phenomenon, but it is a greater threat to employee health and well-being than ever before. While technology has made aspects of many jobs easier, it has also added to the anxieties of office life through information overload, heightened pressure for productivity, and a threatening sense of impermanence in the workplace. In 1996, the World Health Organization labeled stress a “worldwide epidemic.” Today, workplace stress is estimated to cost billion a year in poor performance, absenteeism and health costs.

What is workplace stress?

Stress—the responses our bodies and minds have to the demands placed on them—is a normal part of life and a normal part of any job. Without stress, we wouldn’t meet deadlines, strive to hit sales or production targets, or line up new clients. Meeting the demands and challenges of a job is part of what makes work interesting and satisfying, and it’s often what allows people to develop new skills and advance in their careers. In the workplace, we regularly experience stress-causing situations, react to them with heightened tension, then return to a more relaxed state when the crisis, big or small, is resolved. However, problems occur when stress is so overwhelming or constant that the tension never abates and we never get to relax.

What we think of as “job stress” is what happens when:

  • The challenges and demands of work become excessive.
  • The pressures of the workplace surpass workers’ abilities to handle them.
  • Satisfaction becomes frustration and exhaustion.

When stress crosses the line from normal to excessive, it can trigger physical and emotional responses that are harmful to employees and businesses alike. And unfortunately, for many people “stress” has become synonymous with “work.”


Just After....

whew! month end always means submission of monthly reports and finally i had beaten the deadline.

I went to the roof top to relax my mid and took some lungful of fresh air...







and took the opportunity for some pix too...

Friday, August 1, 2008

Just stress!

I am really pissed off and stressed this few days and as result i started asking "what is stress" and started typing it in my search engine and wow, got lots of result as usual haha.

What Is Stress?

Stress is the emotional and physical strain caused by our response to pressure from the outside world. Common stress reactions include tension, irritability, inability to concentrate, and a variety of physical symptoms that include headache and a fast heartbeat.

It's almost impossible to live without some stress. And most of us wouldn't want to, because it gives life some spice and excitement. But if stress gets out of control, it may harm your health, your relationships, and your enjoyment of life.


What Are The Signs Of Stress?

Stress can cause both mental and physical symptoms. The effects of stress are different for different people.

The mental symptoms of stress include:

  • Tension
  • Irritability
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Feeling excessively tired
  • Trouble sleeping

The physical symptoms of stress include:

  • Dry mouth
  • A pounding heart
  • Difficulty breathing
  • Stomach upset
  • Frequent urination
  • Sweating palms
  • Tight muscles that may cause pain and trembling

Ways To Manage Stress


Humor

Many stress-management experts recommend keeping a sense of humor during difficult situations. Laughing releases muscle tension and helps a person maintain perspective.

Activities as simple as watching a funny movie, listening to a tape of a comedian's routine, or sharing time with a humorous friend can provide a psychological lift and relieve stress.

Hobbies

Regular leisure activities are important in reducing stress. Many people benefit from making time for positive leisure pursuits rather than, for example, spending time watching television in the evening (although that, too, can be relaxing to some degree).

Relaxing hobbies include gardening, painting, bicycling, photography, carpentry, collecting, and many others. In order to obtain the most relaxation and enjoyment, the satisfaction should come in doing the hobby, not in the results. An individual who pursues gardening for relaxation may not grow prize-winning vegetables, but they can be eaten. An amateur photographer may not sell photographs, but they can be admired by friends and family.

Meditation

Used for many years in Eastern cultures, meditation is becoming more widely accepted in the U.S. as a relaxation technique. Meditation reduces heart rate, blood pressure, adrenaline Epinephrine, the hormone that serves as a stimulant in the body, increasing blood pressure and heart rate, among other roles. levels, and skin temperature.

There are a variety of meditation techniques that share a common goal: to achieve relaxation by clearing the mind of stressful outside interferences. Meditation involves achieving a state of consciousness in which the individual focuses on a single thing, such as a key word, sound, or image.

Meditation techniques rely on quiet surroundings, sitting still, and a repetitive mental pattern. Various techniques are taught in instruction books and through religious and nonreligious organizations.

Biofeedback

Biofeedback provides a way for people to learn to control activities over which they normally have no awareness, such as heart rate and muscle tension. It is considered by many health professionals to be a valuable therapeutic tool for reducing stress. Biofeedback involves no discomfort and no risk.

Biofeedback relies on sensitive electronic equipment. Sensors are placed on the body at various locations to measure skin temperature and muscle activity. The sensors are attached to a monitor that detects fluctuations when a person is anxious and displays signals in the form of beeps or light flashes. By watching the monitor, a person learns to control these stressful responses.

Massage Therapy

Massage is the gentle practice of manipulating the body's tissues in order to soothe and heal. It is one of the most ancient of the healing arts, and more people today are relying on it for natural, drug-free relief from the effects of busy, overstressed lives. Massage can relax the entire body and provide new energy that lingers long after the massage is over.

A number of research studies have shown that massage reduces heart rate, lowers blood pressure, increases blood circulation and lymph flow, relaxes muscles, improves range of motion, and increases the production of endorphins, which are the body's own natural painkillers. There are a number of massage therapy techniques, including Swedish massage and Shiatsu.

Massages can be for the full body or particular areas of the body, such as the back and shoulders. Some people choose to wear some clothing during a massage; others prefer to undress or use a dressing gown. During a massage, the person is warmly covered, and only the part of the body on which the therapist is working is uncovered.

from ehealthMD.com



Monday, July 28, 2008

battlefield?!



the past few days are really frustrating! Everything is changing but unfortunately for the worst, I think!

I just cant stand it anymore i want to scream from the top of my lungs and just fill the world with my scream to wake them all up from their nightmare!

Is it really their nightmare or mine? I can see all whats going on! I know everything is not right but i just cannot steer the boat to the right track! I am seeing the end but i just cant tell them were doomed!

I don't know what to do, I know i just cant stand here and watch but i cannot open my lips and talk, I wish i could do something but if i do i will be crushed between the stones!

I know i am not making sense, but who does? When you know something is terribly wrong but why would nobody listen!

This sucks but i am lost! I don't know where to start again. I won my battle against my broken heart and now, here comes another battle.

When will this end?

Is this really a place of unending battles?


Sunday, July 27, 2008

sana pwede kong sabihin kay boss na!



Don't you feel like saying this to your boss?!

"Ano?! yan lang iuutos mo pa sa akin?"

"If you really think that its that important,
e di ikaw nalang gumawa!"

"Pwede ba, Busy ako!"

"Di kyan kasama sa job description ko!"

"Do my work over the week end?! Bakit? may overtime pay ba to?"

"Boss makinig ka kaya sa akin?"

"Shut up when I'm talking to you!"

"Ang OA mo, kino-complicate mo ang mga simpleng problems
para lang feeling mo matalino ka!"

"Thank you, boss. We're all refreshed and challenged
by your unique point of view!"

"It sounds English, but i can't understand a word you're saying."

"I'll try being nicer If you'll try being smarter."

"I'm not rude, you're just insignificant!"

"Okey lang umabsent ka, Boss, It does not really make a dent here."

"Uwi na ko, ha? Bahala ka na dito sa opis."

from HEALTHbeat July-August issue
job stress


and if you successfully said this to your boss, your work related stress should be gone by now, and you must be having another job interview!