Sure it is fun to have a roller coaster ride, it give you the thrills and excitement, because you know the ride will soon stop and you will soon have your feet back on the solid ground, you have the choice to do it again or never to set foot in it ever!
But sure it is no fun at all if your life is a roller coaster ride, you don't know when will it stop and you have no choice but to ride it till it stops going around!
I just love this song!
I'm wiser now
I'm not the foolish boy you used to know
So long ago
I'm stronger now
I've learned from my mistakes which way to go
And I should know
I put myself aside to do it your way
But now I need to do it all alone
And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'll keep it real you know
Time for me to do it on my own
Yeah yeah, mmm, yeah yeah
It's over now
I can't go back to living through your eyes
Too many lines
And if you don't know by now
I can't go back to being someone else
Not anymore
I never had a chance to do things my way
So now it's time for me to take control
And I am not afraid to try it on my own
I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'm gonna keep it real you know
Time for me to do it
Oh I start again go back to one
I'm running things my way
Can't stop me now, I've just begun
Don't even think about it
There ain't no way about it
I'm taking names, the ones of mine
Yes I'm gonna take my turn
It's time for me to finally stand alone, stand alone
I am not afraid to try it on my own
And I don't care if I'm right or wrong
I'll live my life the way I feel
No matter what I'm gonna keep it real you know
It's time for me to do it
See I'm not afraid
I don't know what came to me, i just started driving along the south super highway and just took snapshots along the way!
Waste of time? not exactly! i just enjoyed the view from the window of my car!
Thank goodness! there was no traffic hehehe!
I am again standing in another fork road in my journey to life. I do not have any idea where this two separate roads will bring me, but i can not stand here all my life trying to figure out what they offer! I have to choose a path and take another step forward.
Its hard to choose especially if you do not have any idea where the road you choose will lead you, but as they always say, you always have to move forward though your choice is not as good as you wished it will be, you definitely have to make a choice.
The last time i encountered a fork road i made a mistake and threaded a less traveled road, now i think i have am a little more wiser than i was before and take the road more travelers choose.
My previous journey was not as good as i had expected, but it took me this far, i know i learned some lessons in it though i am yet stubborn to accept the lessons i learned from it, i might be able to use some of those lessons in this another journey.
Our journey make us wiser each time, and become more aware of things as they happen, and only when we accept and learn from them that we will be able to defend ourselves in a much similar situation.
The journey is not easy but it will not be very hard if we know what to do, I just hope today as i take my first step, I will be more productive and much more wiser in facing all the obstacle that the road to life will throw.
Who wants to buy my heart?!.
im having it 4 sale..
though its only 2nd hand,
still it functions well..
cause once i sold it whole
it was returned to me into pieces.
but now i had it all repaired
so now im back in my business.
who wants to buy my heart?
satisfaction guaranteed.
it has free service charge
and a lifetime warranty.
so if your asking 4 d price
well your in a bargain.
it only costs your
LOVE..
This is me, definitely tore my chest open and offered my heart to the woman of my dreams.
Unfortunately she did not accepted my offering and now i could no longer put my heart back.
The wound is still fresh and my heart is still in my hands waiting for her to come back and caress it and to heal my wound!
I know her coming back is just a dream, for i know she had her own dream and she found it in the arms of another man. I know i have to accept my defeat but i just don't know how to start!
I had tried a hundred and one times to forget her, but i was just too stubborn to give up. I love her so much that i don't know how to forget her.
You might say , i am stupid for clinging on for so long.
You might despise me for committing the same mistake.
You might even hate me for being stubborn.
But what should i do?
It is easy to say forget her, but do you have a way how?
Do you have any potion that erases memories and pains?
Would it be right if i love someone else again though i know my heart is still chained to her?
Is it alright to offer my heart once more to someone?
for the past weeks alcohol had been one of my constant companion!
Its easy to be with if you are broken hearted!
Now looking back "AGAIN". I know what i did was wrong! but the temptation that alcoholic drinks offer to people who wish to forget is too strong that a human body couldn't resist! for the past few days i had been very busy feeding my broken heart with painful memories, and i know i cant live like that, i need to move on, i need to do something to forget!
I need to switch my attention, i need to make myself preoccupied and make my heart forget!
there are times i wanted to drown myself with wine, to make my heart immuned with pain, but that would only destroy me more, i need to do something productive.
something i would be proud of someday!
Sometimes, i want to drown myself with work, but the more i tire my mind with the things i do , the more my heart remember her!
She introduced me to accounting, she love numbers, i love literature.
and now i learned to love numbers, i learned she hated literature!
i have to get out! live like life is wonderful, I need to capture moments that make me smile, in that way i hope, someday somewhere i will find another love, another life!
i hope...
.....
the choice i made is right!
at last!
five years! five long years and still the pain was as unbearable as it was first inflicted in my heart
five years ago!
I tried all the things i should and must do in order to forget and ignore the pain! But the pain just don't go away! and its making me crazy!
They say the mind was placed higher than the heart in order to rule over it! but why does my heart rule over my mind?
My mind says forget her! and live your life but why can't i go on? I am going in circles, I thought i had forgotten her, I thought i started living but then, I was wrong, I do still love her, I still treasure her in my heart!
I want to forget, but my heart says only her name! I want to live but i cant live with out her!
I don't know what to do!
Five long years! but still my stupid heart longs for her, calls her name and simply don't want to forget!
I can't do anything but shed tears as i let my heart go on to its stupidity! I cry and thats what i always do!
When will i win over this battle? Will i wait for another lifetime? I know is no longer normal! I know i have to live, I know i have to move on! But how?....
Is forever a very long wait?
.....
I need to know! I need to understand!
.....
But how?
Some say laughter is the best medicine, a therapy that simply cure a broken heart! but then on second thought how would you be able to laugh or to smile if you are broken hearted?
How could you smile if your in pain? How can laughter lift up your spirit and set your soul soaring up into the heavens if drops of blood rush out of your heart in its every move?
I dont know how could a smile or laughter would help someone in deep pain, how this simple movement of face muscles relieve the pain from the heart.
Do we consider smile a therapy for a broken heart because when we smile the world smile with us? but when we cry, we cry alone?
Is smile or laughter just another fake medicine for broken hearts?
I am lost! enlighten me! help me find a real medicine for my broken heart!
A friend invited me for a nature trip in Quezon province and because i have no idea of the place i agreed to his idea. I badly needed a change of scenery and i thought this is my chance.
I am not a very good photographer, I just would like to share some.
A cotton tree proudly show off what he got!
the luxury of living with wheels hahaha
beetle nut ready for harvesting!
the country side and its magnificence!
passed this hut! just got seconds to click the shutter and very glad of the outcome!
A closer look!
The change of scenery was good and it sure gave me a beautiful memory.
I had been wearing different kind of mask for the a long time! Mask that simply cover and disguise the true me, and the mask i choose to use today is "MY SMILE".
I don't really have any idea why there is a need for me to use one, only a strong feeling urges me to use it for cover and for disguise .
I don't know why i am wearing it, and i don't have an idea when will i stop using it, is it because i want to deceive them? or i just want to deceive myself?
Everyday as i go to work, as i pass by people who know, love and hate me sometimes, i carefully choose a mask that would fit me, a mask that would hide the true feelings, and emotions i have within, and i always go out triumphantly deceiving them, but i never succeeded deceiving myself!
I don't know how i do it but every time an occasion calls for it, my mind is always ready to provide a good mask that fits and me help me blend in.
I don't know my real purpose in using my mask, but the need to use it always come in unexpected.
I want to stop using it and throw out my mask for good, but how? I don't have an idea!
How about you, are you also using your mask?
What are your reasons, are they clear?
Help me! Help yourself! Is there really a need for a mask?
Paper works and other documents had been constantly pilling up in my table for the past week. and the result? cluttered and unorganized work station, this seems to be the view in my office since last week, papers, receipts, memo, and other documents for review and checking seems to be pouring in and i cant catch up!
The only resort? work twelve hours a day, and bring work in my apartment for the week end!
Working late and bringing work home is not funny, especially if you want to live a normal life, but then you have to work to live, life in the city is not that cheap, you have to pay bills, and sometimes there are needs and wants that always finds its way to you.
Well i am not complaining, I love my Job and plan to stick with it for long time. The work you do even tough give you the sense of who you are and definitely define you as an individual.
And i am not planning to have a cluttered and unorganized table for a long time, few more days and i know i will be back on track and this clutter will soon be a pile of organized thoughts and a neat pile of job well done.
